Entries from July 2009 ↓
July 31st, 2009 — office life
I work in an open plan office environment. Not too far away is a biggish man I don’t work with. He regularly makes phone calls on speakerphone. No, correction – he ALWAYS uses speakerphone.
He called his wife today (or she called him) about something. It was a private conversation, yet the entire floor could practically hear it. Here’s how I documented the event via email with someone sitting nearby who I shall name “Babe”:
Babe:
Why the feck would you have a private conversation on speaker???
Me:
EVERY time he uses the phone I ask myself the same question.
Never heard such long pauses either…
I was waiting to hear some of those phrases annoyed women use.
Babe:
I’d like to use a couple of phrases on him.
It’s so rude in an open plan office. It makes you sound like a pompous prat.
Me:
I “overheard” it’s his last day today anyway.
I got a muffin yesterday, so I’ll let it slide.
[regurgitating the conversation we heard on the phone]
Wife: “When are you coming home?”
Biggish man: *pause for 10 minutes, then ignore the question while wife asks another*
Wife: “Do you know the difference between…” [something about types of drills]
Biggish man: *pause for what seemed like 2 hours*
Wife: “It’s ok to say no”…
She must talk to the wall most of the time.
Babe:
Hehe!
Thank God. Glad we won’t have to hear his life story on speaker next week.
And I bet she has no idea that we all hear everything she says. What if she said something really personal or inappropriate on day??
Me:
Something really personal or inappropriate like:
“What are you wearing?”
“Is that Jimmy sitting next to you now? He stinks”
“You really should shower daily to get rid of that rash”
“I played bingo today”
Babe:
All of the above
SpeakerPhone Ryan

At least get yourself a Grandstream GXV-3000 Video Phone as a courtesy. That way, the person on the other end can see you’re on freakin’ speakerphone!
July 31st, 2009 — relationships
I got this forward today about the words women use in (potential) arguments and what they really mean. For any engineers in relationships, even if this is made up, it’s always wise to be aware of potential problems/hazards. It’s called a Risk Assessment in the Safety Department.
“Lads – this information may one day save your life. Memorise it.
Ladies – I thought it was a fairly accurate assessment.
NINE WORDS WOMEN USE
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission.. Don’t Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about
nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at
all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ .. that will bring on a ‘whatever’).
(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F– YOU!
(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer to # 3.
* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid (if they remember the terminology).
* Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, cause they know it’s true!!!”
July 23rd, 2009 — site life
I managed to score a site visit this week which meant, thankfully, I wouldn’t have to go into the office. I had to “supervise” the despatch of some concrete precast units out of our old yard. There’s been no one there for a couple of months while we wait for news that we can transport some more “grey gold” out.
It was a logistical nightmare! Nah not really, but I had to arrange for a crane, two riggers and two different transport companies to arrive that morning so we can load and despatch the units. I arranged it to happen on Monday and looked forward to wearing my long sleeve high viz PPE and site gear (for a change).
We had our yard set up on some spare land in a quarry, so there were other operations happening nearby. I was there for about a year before I moved into the office a couple of months ago, so it was nice to be able to get back there every now and then and catch up with the supervisors from other companies that own the place who I’d befriended while working there.
But wouldn’t you just know it. It hails on Monday. It rains heavily on Monday. It is VERY windy on Monday. And I’m working outside all morning. To top it off, one of the transport companies stuffed up and thought they were supposed to come out on Tuesday (and tried to make it out like it was my fault). It wasn’t my fault, but I didn’t really care for 2 reasons.
- It was very windy so we probably wouldn’t have lifted the 40+ tonne units anyways, and
- It meant I could be out of office again for a second day.
So you could say I was a winner AND a loser those two days.
You’re a winner when you get to go out of the office on site for a day (or two)… and a loser when that day is one of the few days it HAILED and rained and gusted and roared (simultaneously) this winter.
You’re a winner when you finish early on site and go chat to the chick on the weighbridge for an hour to avoid going back to the office… and a loser when she tells you she used to think you were gay (but that it doesn’t matter if you are or not)
*slaps palm on head*
WTF?! And she couldn’t even tell me WHY she used to think I was gay. Probably cause I wasn’t much interested in cars and boats and booze and cigarettes. But seriously… WTF?!!

Dilbert 2.0 - 20 Years of Dilbert
July 22nd, 2009 — design, site life
This article from this month’s Engineers Australia magazine is by a young design engineer who talks about the importance of site visits for inexperienced designers. Visiting a construction site where your design is being constructed can be a steep learning experience.
The biggest point he alluded to is constructability of the design. By that I mean that whatever you design needs to be able to be built. If it’s too complicated or fiddly or downright impossible, you may experience some of that “slightly more descriptive” language that was mentioned. But don’t take offence at that (that’s just how they are) – use it as a learning experience.
I’ve experienced the particular example given where a reinforcement steel fixer complains that they are unable to construct a unit as it is shown in the drawing. There are a few things structural designers need to consider when designing reinforced concrete / precast units (for reinforcement in particular).
- N32+ size rebars are very heavy to carry. If you have a concrete unit say 18m long and this bar is to go on the top of a 1.5m high wall, you might need 5 steelfixers to carry it and hold it in position while it is being tied. If there is the possibility of using more of a smaller size bar, do it, purely for manual handling reasons. Obviously if it doesn’t give you the required capacity you can’t, but at least consider it.
- Reinforcement does not come bent at a sharp 90 degrees like it is drawn on the design drawings. When it is made, reinforcement is bent around a pin so it has a radius – there is a curvature. If you have double layer reinforcement in a unit, this could make things very unpleasant for the steelfixer.
- You can’t have 2 x 90 degree bends in close proximity to each other. In practice, as mentioned above, this is made into a U-bar around a pin to suit. So when you are dealing with pull-out bars that have to be flush with the face of the concrete, it might not always be that easy.
- Don’t have too much reinforcement in one location! You have to realise that when the concrete is poured, it has to go between and bond with the reinforcement. If it’s designed such that you have a wall of reinforcement, well it’s just not going to do what it is supposed to.
Why Construction Workers Should Wear Long Sleeve PPE
July 16th, 2009 — nutrition
When taking lunch from home:
- 2-3 bars (muesli or yoghurt topped or whatever – not chocolate bars) – eat one at 10am, one at 3pm.
- Home made sandwiche (a bun might fill you up better than 2 slices of bread) with:
- tuna (plus sweet chilli sauce or mayo)
- peanut butter / vegemite / nutella / jam (any one of multiple of those, with sliced cheese)
- cold meats with a relish of some sort
- Home made sushi (the japanese mayo makes all the difference)
- Left over dinner (bonus points if you’re european or middle eastern and people ask you “what’s that?” on a daily basis)
- Apple / banana / mandarin / some other fruit
- Dried fruit and nut snacks (good for keeping you awake at work)
- Stuff it and buy your own lunch (forget about saving money) – it’ll be a hot, hearty meal. Filling too.
Lunch Ideas Supervisors Have Already Had
- Meat pies
- Sausage rolls / “double dogs”
- Choc milk
- Red Bull / V / ‘Mother’
- Packet of cigarettes
- Sneakers bars
- Icy poles
- Deli foods including chips & gravy, toasted stuff, other stuff
- All contents of the Jiffy van
- Zoo magazine
- The cleaning lady (I hope they had a “condiment” at least…)

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